at first, when my dad just started introducing me to her, who was then his girlfriend, she wasn’t ready to be a stepmom. she got stressed and took it out on my sister and me. later, she started to warm up to my sister and really see her as an intelligent, kind person (which she is). me, on the other hand, she didn’t see that way. she saw me as “goofy”, “not all here in my head”, “not quite right”, etc.
she saw me as a weirdo, she told me these things herself. “why can’t you be like your sister?” she asked me. “why can’t you be normal and engage in deep discussions with me instead of talking about movies and such?”
she started to warm up to me, eventually, but she was always closer to my sister and she would still act hostile to me sometimes, even now. and when she was being like this because of my autism, i was a child. a minor.
i just want someone to listen please, maybe someone who can relate and share their story.
She sounds like someone who has no understanding of what autistic people are like, and was applying the standards of a neurotypical relationship to her interactions with you. She could and perhaps should have taken it upon herself to learn, but your dad also really dropped the ball by not preparing her.
my dad thinks i’m eccentric or awkward but he doesn’t believe i have autism even with my diagnosis, my stepmom has gotten better but she’s still a bit rude
Yeah, neither of them is doing you any favor with their beliefs trumping a diagnosis.