It’s only been legal here for a year but before that I used to ask shady looking people at train stations or in parks. Those usually sell hard drugs but they can still be of help. It’s a clichee but it’s genuinely reliable. But like probably don’t do this. Easy way to get scammed or mugged for a kid.

And I’ve been high on weed plenty around my parents. As a teen I generally didn’t have much of an interest talking to them so they probably didn’t suspect anything when I fucked off straight to my room after walking the dog. Would not recommend that for the first time though. Best to do it at a friend’s house.

So is a good dose of the devil’s lettuce basically unattainable for the victims of upper middle class suburbanite comfort?

If you talk like that you will not get weed, you will get your ass kicked.

My suggestion is just find more friends, go to parties, go to college… There is literally zero chance you go to a college party and there is no weed. It is illegal where I live so even some younger assistants smoked…

But buying it for yourself is a bit different, and you just don’t seem to have the social skills to manage that.

Additionally smoking with friends at a party is very different than smoking alone at home. You can get paranoid and with friends around they can calm you.

Finally wait until you are older, maybe 25 then your brain is more developed and you will fuck it up less.

I would wait until your circumstances change to be honest. At least until your +18 due to (if I recall) the younger you are, the more likely negative health outcomes are.

Also my first couple of times it was pretty full on and while panic and negative thought spirals are rare uncommon, it’d be a shame to wreck your first few times because you’re worried about someone coming home early/environment. Also, absolutely do not drive while intoxicated, regardless of the substance.

To answer your question, you make friends who are in the scene and know how to source some. Buying from strangers is a great way to buy cooking herbs from dickheads. If it’s an option, legal or medical is the far superior route even if it can be tedious.

You need to find\make some friends that work in some type of kitchen. I’ve never worked with kitchen staff that didn’t smoke at a minimum

This is just proof that legalization ACTUALLY keeps the stuff OUT of teenagers hands.

When I was a teen, it was illegal. Everywhere.

Which meant that literally EVERYONE at school had it. I seriously did not pay for weed from 8th grade until about age 22, just because SOMEONE always wanted to party with the fat funny kid. Imagine getting to smoke weed with Chris Farley. Would you charge him? Or would you just invite him?

It wasn’t until I was living with my girlfriend, and we wanted to smoke together that I realized “oh shit…I guess I actually have to go buy it.”

And it was still illegal, which meant everyone had it. I just went to work, and asked literally the first person I worked with who they buy weed from. Turns out she grew/sold it.

It was illegal, and therefore unregulated, and therefore it existed freely.

Now, in most states it’s legal, and thus regulated, and thus the black market can’t exist.

The idea of teenagers NOT having free access to weed is absolutely foreign to me, but it’s the world we live in today. Whereas I grew up in the war on drugs. Which used the D.A.R.E program to educate kids on how cool drugs are, where to get them, and then passed out free samples. Which went missing. Years later I heard conspiracy theories that the D.A.R.E programs ACTUAL goal was to get kids hooked on illegal drugs, so they could arrest them as young adults.

And honestly? I don’t have much in the way of an arguement to dispute that. I’m not saying it’s true. I’m just saying I have no arguement against it.

Unpopular opinion but if you want to experience with it, go tell one of your caregivers. They might be happy that you come to them first and with such joy make it a shared experience.

Though, you are talking about a drug. So you intentions have to be sincere.

The first thing I’ll say is to consider putting it off until you’re older.

That being said, if you don’t know anyone who smokes, you might find it difficult to get some yourself. Your best bet would be to make friends who already have those connections. Many dealers won’t respond if you can’t name a customer that referred you. That might be the biggest hurdle to start with if you aren’t willing to start conversations. Ask classmates about the stoners around school if you can’t think of anyone.

If you manage to make those friends who connect you, though, the actual exchange with a dealer is usually pretty chill. You meet at an agreed upon spot (perhaps a park or something, maybe their house, etc.), and you hand over the money and they hand over the weed. Then you go home. You can show up with a friend if you want, but it’s best practice to let the dealer know that before you show up. A first text might go something like, “Hey, my name is ___. Would it be cool if I bought a dime ($10 worth, often 1 gram)/dub ($20)? I got your number from ___. Would you be down to meet sometime soon?” Some more advanced dealers will offer things like dab cartridges and edibles. Weed smells, and so does paraphernalia, so be sure to keep it in an air-tight container. Don’t front money for drugs, ever. Also, be sure not to let it become too much of a habit. Limit yourself to a couple times a month, or only the weekends, etc.

A marijuana high lasts about 2-3 hours, so if you know you’ll have much more time than that, you’ll be ok. You can also go out to meet up with a friend for awhile, then both go to smoke elsewhere if their house isn’t an option. Most high-schoolers find a nearby, secluded place in some forested area to smoke in, at least where I live. Walking there and back (even while baked) is usually no big deal, unless it’s super far or something. If you don’t have a place like that nearby, any other little hidden spots you can find will probably do if they aren’t too high-key. Just be sure to clean up after yourself. Pack it in, pack it out. You might be able to smoke outside your house after your parents go to bed if you can manage your coughing. If you’re worried about the smell after smoking, smoke outside, change your clothes/put on a top layer first, and brush your teeth.

As for how to smoke, you have some options. Probably the cheapest, easiest, most concealable option would be a small pipe (I’d recommend glass). You can find cheap ones online that can be delivered to your door on websites like dhgate, if you aren’t worried about your parents opening your mail for you. There’s also bongs, joints, and vapes, which each have their own pros and cons. I’m sure there’s a million youtube tutorials for each of those options. When smoking, I think the key is to inhale properly and deeply, which may be difficult starting out. You often hear that people can’t get high their first time smoking weed, but I think this is due to improper smoking technique. I know my first time I definitely wasn’t doing it right.

I was a socially awkward careful teen! I never did it!

If you are an introvert, ask your extroverted sibling to pick and dry some from their friend’s parent’s plants. Then go to the park and smoke it after school. Keep it with a pipe and grinder in a water tight no-spill thermos (keeps smell in and keeps it fresh).

Find someone you know who smokes weed and ask them to hook you up with a dealer. Become friends with them. Smoke at their house.

That’s how it worked for me, when I was a teenager, anyway.

If you make friends with people in bands, especially funk bands, you’ll meet the smokers.

AFAIK dealers today will often sell vape cartridges which may be easiest. You can buy a battery online or at most smoke shops.

I would agree with some posters that smoking with friends is best!

Well first I suggest delaying it if you’re particularly young. My first time was at 19. Anything younger I wouldn’t recommend.

Not legal here. Had a friend who sourced it for me. Lots of people smoke here so I don’t buy directly from someone sketchy but from friends who are more regular smokers.

I like to mix it with tobacco, I’m also a cigarette smoker. Mix weed or hash which is my choice of drug, roll it up (use a filter obviously). Hash must be mixed, weed you can go pure on.

I do live with my parents. I have smoked on my roof or lawn early in the morning, when they’re asleep or not home. At parks at midnight. At some friends house, hotels etc.

For transport, uber. Or a designated driver.

And I too am upper middle class suburban, just happen to be in the third world.

Its nothing that you have to do. If it’s inconvenient, let it be. I haven’t smoked in 3-4 months.

Going to second the recommendation to wait until you’re older since your brain will be more fully developed and less impacted. Since the other comments haven’t really touched on the how I thought I would speak to that. You’ve got a couple of different options depending on your needs.

A very cheap entry point would be a pipe, lighter, and a grinder, then you would get some flower grind it and smoke. The exact breathing and covering process can take a few tries to get right, but if you look up a video you’ll have it in no time. This option is pretty smelly, as you are combusting flower, so if you want to be discreet I recommend airtight storage and a change of clothes for yourself. If you don’t want to keep a pipe you could buy cones for rolling joints.

For a bit more you can get a cheap dry herb vape, which I would recommend. Doesn’t combust so the smell fades faster and its not as rough on your lungs. For this you’ll just need the vape and the grinder.

You could also go for carts and oil/resin vapes, but I wouldn’t trust random carts so not really recommended. For this you’d probably want a 510 battery to smoke carts purchased somewhere reputable. If you go this route live rosin is less bad for you but goes bad faster and is pricier.

When it comes to where, I recommend outdoors somewhere secluded and private. Look for somewhere that will hide you and won’t blow the smoke down to a populated place. Big bonus if its somewhere you’re comfortable since that will lower your chances of having a bad time with your high.

Stay safe, remember its not worth drawing police attention just to get high.

Too old! Yes, too old to begin the training.

I mean, you are stepping into this with some assumptions, then asking us to answer your questions with the, frankly wrong, framework you’ve already established. Like just within the context of what you’ve laid out, its not reasonable to expect anyone to answer. It becomes an issue of actually answering your question versus addressing your assumptions. Also, the manner in which you discuss weed: “you might not have enough time for a good high”; “I would imagine as bad as driving drunk”, “a good dose of the devil’s lettuce”. Its a tell that you have no grounding in experience. If you have 0 grounding in experience, what are you doing making this many assumptions? Maybe consider how little you actually know and reconsider your question accordingly.

Firstly, weed has a long and deep culture that established itself during prohibition. Getting weed from a friend or a dealer, its how it was done for decades, its still the way the majority of people I know who consume it prefer.

In-fact, many of the things you outline as “issues”: they are part of the process. Walking to your friend or dealers house, often with a group of friends, or maybe piling into the car. Its part of the journey, the experience. Buying weed becomes a social activity. As far as people to know who to buy it from, guess what? Its probably at least 25%, maybe even half of everyone you know smokes weed at least occasional. If you are buying off market, its from your electrician friend, or the guy who works food service, or someones brother or sister who has a connection. You call them up, ask if they can hook it up, give them time to do their part (they usually have to go get it themselves), then you head their way, either by foot or skate board, or should you be so lucky, a car. You go, you hang out with your connection, maybe smoke a bit (but not necessarily). Its a social call. Then you get back with your friends, and you walk off to the park to smoke.

As far as smoking, you might have papers, or a pipe. Its pretty common to have both. If you are more serious, you might even go so far as to carry a dab pen and torch with you. Then you smoke. You take a hit and you cough. There can be a bit of a head rush, but thats mostly the coughing. Its a good taste. A rich flavor between tobacco and sweet basil maybe? And then you are stoned for a bit. Its not like alcohol whatsoever. Its just not like that. It does impair you but not at all in the same way. A person who has taken one hit of weed is a far far safer driver than a driver who has had even one beer. Its not like you are falling all over yourself. All a hit is going to do is just makes you a little dumb and have access to more random thoughts than you did previously, like, “Whatever happened to Jon Stamos?” or, “Do red pandas also have thumbs?”. Its not dangerous whatsoever to be walking high, though it might be a bit dangerous to drive stoned. I dont recommend it, but frankly, unless you are like, extremely inexperienced (like first couple times) or extremely high (did a ridiculous amount), its just a non-issue.

The walking somewhere to get weed, scrounging up enough to buy between your friends, then finding a place to go smoke with your friends, its practically a rite of passage in adolescence. And its fun. Its a good time. The walking and going somewhere is practically the point. Its a manner of socializing. Its also something that isn’t built into a “consumption oriented” experience. That’s changing with dispensaries, but there is decades of cultural experience around getting weed from friends. Embedded within your question are views around consumption, capitalism, and even what the entire point of smoking weed actually is. You might challenge some of those views and consider how they are impacting your thinking.